Life is too short to hold a grudge against friends and yourself.
It’s all too easy to say, “I’m never speaking to her/him again!” (cue slamming door). But we never really mean it. I’ve had friends who I’ve confided in about personal issues and trusting them with keeping the information secret, not really expecting to hear that they’ve gone and told a bunch of people.
Trust is a valuable thing to gain and so easy to break. With the situation above you really have just got to weigh up; the reason why they did it and if it’s worth holding a grudge against them about it. For me, the latter’s answer is most certainly not to hold a grudge.
Holding a grudge against yourself DEFINITELY ISN’T the best thing to do. Above the friendship grudge, a personal grudge is where you’re just hating yourself…there’s no two sides of the story, not he said, she said no excuses on why your holding it; just breathe. It sounds easier than it is and therefore may sound pretentious, but believe me, taking a few deep breaths (or Ujjayi breathing aka ocean breath) and pairing it with a forward bend (Uttanasana for you Yoga bunnies out there like me), into Chaturanga and back into down-dog. Repeating this three or four times really helps me to centre and gain a clearer perspective on things.
I digress, life really is WAY too short to be holding grudges…that’s that.
NTR (Note to remember): Forgiveness is divine. Cherish the will to do it.